Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Cordy and I am an aspiring writer. With that being said, I'd like to clarify that I am far from being one of your biggest fans. In fact, you are the means of greatly discouraging me in my personal correspondence and blog posts. How can you use your abilities so frequently? It is entirely unfair and unnecessary. If you don't mind, I'll take a little of your time to remind you of some of your crimes that have ingrained themselves within my memory. (After the trouble you've caused, the least you can do is read through to the end.)
Firstly, concerning "your" and "you're". Naturally, I know the difference but I declare that my fingers don't! How very rude of you to misuse the terms so often. My fingers are constantly at fault and they feel the shame acutely.
Secondly, which perhaps I should have mentioned firstly, when I am referring to a knight in shining armor, could you not secure me the benefit of a "K"? The very idea that I would be talking of a night in shining armor gives the impression I imagine there is some incredibly indescribable mass that is given some form with the use of medieval garb. Is it so very difficult for you to lend your aid, by the addition of but one letter, to spare me from such an embarrassment?
Though I am sorry to say it I am by no means through as I have another objection. Would you please exercise a little self-control and keep your personal suggestions and automatic corrections to yourself? It was perhaps four months ago when you intruded upon my sentence and instead of my intended use of the word "consolation", you had to add your flourish to the mix and say, "conciliation". I ask you, how could you do such a thing? I can understand that my spelling would have been at fault. (Indeed, the mere mention of Spelling has reminded me of the letter I have yet to write to the old snob.) However, returning to the subject at hand, for you to insert your own correction without my consent is really too much!
In conclusion, I implore you to seek your fortune elsewhere. Or better yet, not at all. Might I offend you by suggesting your retirement?
I remain your continual enemy,
Cordy
So true Cordy! I was laughing so hard and agreeing while I read this!!!
ReplyDeleteHaha, good! I love making people laugh!
DeleteOh my word!!! CORDY! I LOVE THIS POST! This was hilarious! And just perfect, okay? The end.
ReplyDelete(Actually, not quite the end. I have a few more things to say.) About the words "your" and "you're"...YEEEEES! Typos are so cruel when it comes to those words. Like we KNOW what the correct word is, right? Then why do we always write the wrong one? Most aggravating indeed. :P
Ach, yes! The whole spell check thing. Really! The nerve of the fellow to go and switch words on you...without your permission. "Is this to be endured? It shall NOT be!!"
"Might I offend you by suggesting your retirement?" HAHAHA. You're awesome. :D And yes! Do PLEASE write a letter to Spelling ("the old snob"...haha. Love that! ;)). He NEEDS the correction most dreadfully!
In other words, DO MORE POSTS LIKE THIS PLEASE!! :D :D
~Miss March
Hehehe, THANKS!!!
DeleteI have some ideas for other 'letters' like this one so I'm glad you approved of this one. I'm going to have some fun with the spelling one for sure! :)
I always die a little inside every time I make the mistake of "you're" vs. "your". Ah well. We shall have to endure through our typos, I suppose! *encouraging hug*
ReplyDeletePS. This was a great post. :)
Me too!! The shame I feel is unreal! Haha.
DeleteThanks, Natalie.
Hahahahaha, Cordy, I love it!! And yes, I quite agree...typos are such dreadfully annoying things.
ReplyDeleteThey're so rude! :P I'm sure I could get along without them. ;D
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